5 Ways to Connect With Your Autistic Child

Sunday, July 6th, 2025

At Little Sunshine Pediatric Therapy, one of the most common questions I hear from parents is:

“How can I better connect with my autistic child?”

As both a speech therapist and a parent, I want to reassure you—connection doesn’t always look like eye contact or long conversations. It’s not about changing your child to fit a mold. It’s about joining them and showing them you see, respect, and accept who they are.

Here are five ways to connect with your child: 

1. Follow Their Lead: When your child stims, lines up toys, or imitates something they may have heard from media or others—they’re communicating something. Stimming may mean they're happy. it may also mean they're dysregulated. Echolalia (imitating what they hear) often has communicative intent behind it. And line up toys--well, that is what Your child enjoys and all play is valid, even if it looks "different." Instead of redirecting or trying to “fix” the moment, step into it. Sit beside them. If they love spinning the wheels on a toy car, spin it with them and say, "Wow that's so cool!" This is shared joy—and it’s one of the most powerful ways to connect.

2. Get Curious, Not Controlling: Connection happens when your child feels safe being themselves. Try swapping “How do I get them to do ___?” with “I wonder what they’re telling me with this behavior?”

Maybe they need a break. Maybe they’re showing you how they make sense of the world. When we pause and observe with curiosity, we show them we are open to understanding who they are.

 3. Use Their Interests to Build Bridges: Whether your child is passionate about elevators, dinosaurs, or a specific YouTube song—lean in. Share the moment with them. Provide them with language from their point of view ("I like it!" "This is fun!"). Sometimes just sitting next to them as they play is better than trying to grab their toys and join in. Shared interests creates opportunities for language, even if that language isn’t verbal.

4. Respect Their Communication Style: Some children use gestures, AAC devices, written,  echolalia, or body language to communicate. All of these are valid forms of communication. Instead of focusing on getting your child to verbally speak, focus on the moments when they are communicating and acknowledge their communication attempts. This will make them feel like they are understood. 

5. Celebrate Who They Are (Not Who the World Expects Them to Be): Always remember, your child is not the same as a friends child or someone's child you met in a Facebook group. Your child will grow and progress on their own timeline. Take moments to say:

“I love how your brain works.”

 “I love spending time with you.”

 “You are exactly who you’re meant to be.”

 Finally, Connection is not about changing your child—it’s about changing how we show up for them.You don’t need to do more. You just need to slow down and see them for who they are. You got this! 

----

Are you looking for a speech therapist or occupational therapist in the St. Petersburg area? We are here for you and ready to help. Contact us today for a free 15 minute phone consultation.