Why Following Your Child’s Lead Matters (More Than You Think)

Sunday, April 27th, 2025

When it comes to supporting a child’s speech and language development, one of the most powerful things we can do is simple: follow their lead.

As parents, caregivers, and therapists, it can be tempting to jump in. Believe me, I get it. It's hard not to direct or structure every single moment.  i am always  catching myself when I am with my son. But real growth happens when we slow down, observe, and join a child where they are, rather than where we expect them to be. 

So, let's get into it. What does following a child’s lead actually mean? It means paying attention to what they are interested in, what they are communicating (verbally or nonverbally), and joining them in that experience without trying to immediately shift or control it.

It’s about seeing the world through their eyes and respecting their choices, curiosity, and communication style.

Following a child's lead is important for language development because:  

• It builds trust and connection. Children are more likely to communicate when they feel heard and valued.
• It keeps interactions meaningful. When we talk about what they care about, they are naturally more engaged and motivated to communicate.
• It models natural language. Instead of drilling words, we model language in real contexts — making it more meaningful and easier to learn.
• It help build confidence. When children see that their ideas and actions matter, they become more confident communicators.

 Here are a few tips to help you follow your child's lead:

• Observe first. Watch what your child is interested in before jumping in.
• Join, don’t direct. Sit with them, play alongside them, and comment on what they’re doing without taking over.
• Match their energy and focus. If they’re stacking blocks, stack with them. If they’re lining up cars, line up cars too!
• Model language naturally. Describe what they’re doing, expand their words, and add new vocabulary without pressuring them to repeat you.
• Celebrate their communication. Whether it’s a gesture, a sound, a word, or a sentence--acknowledge it! Remember,  all communication counts! 

The other day, I watched my almost two-year-old sit and “read” his favorite book, My Groovy Buttons, aloud in his own little way.

He wasn’t perfectly reciting the words and that wasn’t the goal.

By letting him take the lead,  by reading it a million times when he asked, by listening when he was ready — I gave him the space to feel confident to "read" all by himself. 

Following a child’s lead isn’t about letting go of goals or giving up structure entirely — it’s about recognizing that meaningful learning happens through connection, not control.

If you’re  looking for a speech therapist or occupational therapist in the St. Petersburg area, we are here to help! At Little Sunshine Pediatric Therapy, we provide child-led, connection-based therapy services for toddler to school-age children. Contact us to learn more about how we can support your family’s journey.